Think about money, honey.

Lots of drama lately in the big house in the woods. Three women have moved out during the past four months, and in a few weeks, I will be the fourth. Someone new was supposed to move in today but didn’t. When I complained about a few things recently I became a “troublemaker” and am getting the silent treatment. I understand now why older people don’t want to live in nursing homes. While this is not a nursing home, I have felt like I’m back in high school.  Maybe shared living is a viable option for some, but here, it didn’t even work for the extroverts.

The last woman who moved out is now living in a motel room for $900 a month. She is 65 and has lived in 33 places during the past year. Germaine Greer recently said in an interview, “People are being hurtful to me all the time. Try being an old woman.” During the past 10 years, the suicide rate for women rose more than 31 percent. The largest increase was observed among women aged 60-64 years — nearly a 60 percent rise from 4.4 per 100,000 to 7.0 suicides per 100,000 people.

The condo I bought needs work but it’s a better option than being out on the highway and paying for motels. This felt kind of exciting a year ago after I “left home” but the prospect of continuing this any longer has lost its luster. I am not 25 anymore. Old women need a place of their own. I was smart enough to get one before I went through all my money. It has an extra bedroom and 1.5 baths, so if worse comes to worse I can rent out a room. This is what my great-grandmother eventually had to do to survive. My last place only had one bathroom and a den.

If I was to give advice to any woman, at any age, I would say “think about money.” Eventually, you get old and need a lot of it. I lived my whole life thinking money didn’t matter. Well, it does. Better to realize this when you are young enough to do something about it.

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12 thoughts on “Think about money, honey.

  1. Congratulations on your condo. The work that is needed can provide a way to personalize your dwelling and a renewed sense of accomplishment.

    By way of providing emotional support, I’ll share one of my views on our species. Many people are shallow and self-centered/self-serving. Add a few of the inevitable damaging life experiences and the result is a pretty unattractive crowd. Examining one’s beliefs, thought patterns and practices takes courage, few have it. The rest torture themselves and others.

    Best to disregard, disengage and move forward. Lessons learned.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree. The less I have to interact with the general public the better. The older I become, the more selective I become in who I spend my time with.

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    1. I have a friend who is from Sweden and he said that when his mother got Alzheimer’s she was well taken care of at no cost to the family. The US is a very hard place to live on so many different levels. Thanks for your comment.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. When I read your blog there is always a desire to step back and re-evaluate myself and my situation. I thank you for that.

    Your advice here is golden. My mother tried SO hard to get this point across to me as a young girl. I guess she tried too hard because I never listened. I have many riches but money and future security are not on the list. It is a strange thing, to get older and realize that :

    I may not die first.

    My kids might not want to take me in or care for me should I need it. ( Not that I would ever consider that unless I had to (( see above)) .

    It is very hard to have to go back to work at a “certain age”…if you get hired at all.

    Please keep writing about these things. Girls may not listen to their mothers but they might hear your words of wisdom. My daughters are all in their twenties now, and they all read your blog because I told them about your journey. The idea of Cinderella isn’t dead but the desire of women to be self sufficient, strong individuals is growing huge now.

    Thanks again.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. The hard part of having relationships is realizing not everyone has the same dedication as you have. I have lots of acquaintances but only a few that I would classify as friends. Most people I’ve encountered are fickle and don’t have any qualms throwing others under the bus. I’m not pessimist but a realistic. I wish things were different but they’re not. I’m glad you have moved out of that uncomfortable arrangement. There are much worse things than living alone.

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